Just a Quick Run. . .

I have a tendency to inconvenience myself. Sometimes I don’t think far enough ahead and I do silly things like leave my lunch in the fridge at my apt. Then I spend my lunch hour thinking to myself well that was dumb, I could be eating right now if I’d brought that food I purposely prepared for myself with me. Unfortunately often I inconvenience myself because I am capricious. (If you don’t know what that means I'm helping you expand your vocabulary -look it up.) Sometimes I decide to go on spur-of-the-moment adventures. . . Adventures are fine. My problem is that I allow myself to be distracted even when I know I don’t have time. Example:

I recently got asked on a date—it happens sometimes. I said I’d go. He said he’d pick me up after work . . . and the day rolled around.

That day I drove back from work, found I had a lot of extra energy, and decided I wanted to go running. Most people would have looked at the clock, thought to themselves oh I only have an hour before the date. I should NOT go running right now. My brain doesn’t work that way.


First of all I DO NOT LIKE RUNNING. Every 3-4 months I forget I hate jogging and I try it out again. I get all dressed up in exercise clothes, put on running shoes, and do my hair up in a sporty ponytail. Then I spend about fifteen minutes running. Then I remember how miserable running is and go back home.

I think by a certain point in their lives most people begin to find the activities and hobbies they like and can commit to—they have a list of things they will do and a list of things they will not do.

 List of things to DO
- go on walks
- eat popcorn
- smile at people
- go to work
- write a bucketlist
- do things on your bucketlist
- charge your phone
- finish the hat you started crochetting last Christmas
- return your overdue library books
- call your mother


Things to NEVER do
- eat escargo
- try chocolate covered ants
- go sky diving
- read a scary book
- eat escargo
- try sushi
- shave my head
- get a pet bear cub
-eat escargo

Running should be on my list of things not to do.

Because I thought I had time to spare I put on running pants, pulled on tennis shoes, and walked out my door without an explanation to my roommate of where I was going or when I would be back. My plan was to run a total of ten minutes, which is a semi-rational expectation because I begin remembering that I hate running about 5 minutes into my run and head back to my apartment. However I must have felt especially motivated because I came back about 20 minutes later —doubling my usual running time. Which meant I still had an entire forty minutes to get ready for my date.

I walked up the stairs to my apartment, did a few stretches, and then twisted my door handle. Locked.

I did not take my key with me. I had assumed my roommate would somehow know the crazed inner-workings of my brain and not lock the door. I hadn't taken my phone, in fact I don't think I even had my roommates number at the time. At this point I had a moment of panic. So I took a deep breath and went through a few rational steps that most people go through when they find that they are locked out of their apartment.

I tried the door again. Still locked. Then I tried the windows. Also locked. Then I stood in front of my locked apartment and bit my lip.

The biggest problem with this situation is that it is not socially acceptable to go on dates when you are in sweaty work-out clothes and stink. I'd already wasted 10 minutes. Time was running out.

My solution was to walk around my apartment complex and knock on every girl's apartment door until someone answered. I think my plan was to maybe beg some girl to let me use her shower—although I'm not sure what exactly I would have worn afterwards. I couldn't put my sweaty shirt and pants back on.

The problem of what I'd actually do if someone answered the door did not occur to me until someone did answer there door.

Random girl: hi

Me: hi

RG: Can I help you?

Me: So, funny story. . . I went running this afternoon.

RG: That's actually not that funny. It's pretty normal.

Me: And also I locked myself out of my apartment.

RG: Still not funny.

Me: And also I have a date in like fifteen minutes

Long pause

RG: Well did you try getting a spare key from the manager's office?

I had not thought of that.

So then I went through the process of knocking on another stranger's door and asking for a key to my apartment.  —Note to others: this is not the BEST way to introduce yourself to a new apartment complex. If you use this approach most people will remember you as the sweaty girl who locked herself out of her apartment, had a date in ten minutes, and had crazy eyes. It may take a while to live such a reputation down. . .

In case you were concerned, I did manage to get my key, take a speed shower, and get most of my clothing on before my date arrived. I greeted him with clean clothes, wet hair, socks in hand, and an exciting story that detailed my own stupidity and lack of time management.

 

 Needless to say he was impressed.